THE EVOLUTION OF JUDICIAL TYRANNY IN THE UNITED STATES:

"If the judges interpret the laws themselves, and suffer none else to interpret, they may easily make, of the laws, [a shredded] shipman's hose!" - King James I of England, around 1616.

“No class of the community ought to be allowed freer scope in the expression or publication of opinions as to the capacity, impartiality or integrity of judges than members of the bar. They have the best opportunities of observing and forming a correct judgment. They are in constant attendance on the courts. Hundreds of those who are called on to vote never enter a court-house, or if they do, it is only at intervals as jurors, witnesses or parties. To say that an attorney can only act or speak on this subject under liability to be called to account and to be deprived of his profession and livelihood by the very judge or judges whom he may consider it his duty to attack and expose, is a position too monstrous to be entertained for a moment under our present system,” Justice Sharwood in Ex Parte Steinman and Hensel, 95 Pa 220, 238-39 (1880).

“This case illustrates to me the serious consequences to the Bar itself of not affording the full protections of the First Amendment to its applicants for admission. For this record shows that [the rejected attorney candidate] has many of the qualities that are needed in the American Bar. It shows not only that [the rejected attorney candidate] has followed a high moral, ethical and patriotic course in all of the activities of his life, but also that he combines these more common virtues with the uncommon virtue of courage to stand by his principles at any cost.

It is such men as these who have most greatly honored the profession of the law. The legal profession will lose much of its nobility and its glory if it is not constantly replenished with lawyers like these. To force the Bar to become a group of thoroughly orthodox, time-serving, government-fearing individuals is to humiliate and degrade it.” In Re Anastaplo, 18 Ill. 2d 182, 163 N.E.2d 429 (1959), cert. granted, 362 U.S. 968 (1960), affirmed over strong dissent, 366 U.S. 82 (1961), Justice Black, Chief Justice Douglas and Justice Brennan, dissenting.

" I do not believe that the practice of law is a "privilege" which empowers Government to deny lawyers their constitutional rights. The mere fact that a lawyer has important responsibilities in society does not require or even permit the State to deprive him of those protections of freedom set out in the Bill of Rights for the precise purpose of insuring the independence of the individual against the Government and those acting for the Government”. Lathrop v Donohue, 367 US 820 (1961), Justice Black, dissenting.

"The legal profession must take great care not to emulate the many occupational groups that have managed to convert licensure from a sharp weapon of public defense into blunt instrument of self-enrichment". Walter Gellhorn, "The Abuse of Occupational Licensing", University of Chicago Law Review, Volume 44 Issue 1, September of 1976.

“Because the law requires that judges no matter how corrupt, who do not act in the clear absence of jurisdiction while performing a judicial act, are immune from suit, former Judge Ciavarella will escape liability for the vast majority of his conduct in this action. This is, to be sure, against the popular will, but it is the very oath which he is alleged to have so indecently, cavalierly, baselessly and willfully violated for personal gain that requires this Court to find him immune from suit”, District Judge A. Richard Caputo in H.T., et al, v. Ciavarella, Jr, et al, Case No. 3:09-cv-00286-ARC in the U.S. District Court for the Middle District of Pennsylvania, Document 336, page 18, November 20, 2009. This is about judges who were sentencing kids to juvenile detention for kickbacks.


Friday, June 12, 2026

The Miller/Gransbury's Onion

 



There comes a point in every citizen's life when they realize they have wandered into a government process so convoluted that it deserves its own agricultural classification.

Some people encounter red tape.

I encountered an onion.

A very large onion.

An onion with legal counsel called Sir Frank W. Miller, Esq. of Hancock Estabrook, LLP, a law firm belongs to a very important person: Timothy Murphy, brother of Chief Administrative Judge of Upstate New York James P. Murphy.

The story began innocently enough.  My husband and I needed court and deed records. Not because we collect court records and deed records for fun, but because (1) we wanted to see whether we could clear address certain unfairly imposed sanctions and restore our law licenses based on new evidence and new laws; and because (2) we wanted to prepare a non-frivolous tax certiorari petition on inequality grounds for our property in the Town of Hamden this year - which already did not happen because of the paywall.  

Issue No. 1 was important also because Sir Miller was trying very hard to convince courts that we deserved sanctions and anti-filing injunctions specifically because of sanctions that we sought to vacate - and that Lady Gransbury helpfully (to Sir Miller) paywalled away from us.  

Lady Gransbury's publicly confirmed that she digitized and destroyed originals of the court records from 2007 to 2024 - compare:




But - instead of putting those records on NYSCEF into public access - as other court records already are - she is SELLING them, for 

(1) a $5.00 pay-per-view fee;

(2) per-document fee; and, 

(3) annual fees are also "available" - $300.00 for in-state viewers and double, $600 - for out-of-state viewers.

Gransbury says: to fight online deed fraud.

So - we sued her in Neroni v Gransbury, EF2026-106 (when you click on the name, the text of the lawsuit will open from the official court archive, NYSCEF) for presuming that we, out of state users, are more prone to deed fraud than in-state viewers, by putting a double fees on us.

What did she do - moved for sanctions claiming she never made such a presumption.  Maybe sometimes she needs to think what she is doing and what conclusions may be reasonably drawn from what she is doing.

Of course, Gransbury - and her attorney Frank W. Miller, Esq., and Delaware County Attorney Amy Merklen - tried to fraudulently (I stress that word, fraudulently) claim that no such paywalls exist.

That false claim is - what is the polite French word? - ah: BULL.

 Because the pay-per-view wall both on the deeds and on the digitized court records in Delaware County (NY) online VENDOR's portal - not official court portal - is observable evidence clearly shows when anybody visits Delaware County public records website:







Now - why did I need to see A LOT of deed records so that the pay-per-view paywall would start meaning a lot to me, to the point of filing a lawsuit against "Lady" Gransbury?

Let's continue this as a fairy tale.

As of January 1, 2026, The Custodians of the Records (Lady Haley L. Gransbury of 3 Court Street, Delhi NY Supreme and County Court Castle), explained that access would now cost us - and any other litigant in Delaware County, NY who would want to prepare and honest-to-God non-frivolous tax certiorari petition on inequality grounds - approximately the GDP of a not-so-small island nation.

Because The Honorable Knights of Tax Assessment Units of each of the Delaware County townships use 5-year-comparative sale method in assessment of property taxes.

Which means - in order to verify whether a taxpayer/property owner has a non-frivolous ground to bring a tax certiorari petition, allowed by the NYS Legislature to be brought every single year (Article 7 of Real Property Actions and Proceedings Law), the taxpayer/property owner must first pay Lady Gransbury $5.00 to simply view each one of the thousands of deeds of properties sold in the municipality over the 5-year period 

Which, of course, throws legislative intent for an easy, quick and economical tax certiorari proceeding contemplated by the NYS Legislature out the door, and makes tax certiorari proceedings UNAFFORDABLE in Delaware County, NY, one of the poorest counties in New York State.

Lady Gransbury explained her decision for paywalls, for both digitized court records, and the deeds, in the following way:



Meaning - she admitted, under the penalty of perjury, that she INTENTIONALLY restricted my access to those records, "for fear of online deed fraud".  Figure.

So, her fear of "deed fraud" - unsubstantiated as to me - she never provided any proof substantiating it, trumps the Legislative intent behind making tax certiorari proceedings easy, efficient and cheap - for everybody, INCLUDING me.

What happened next is hilarious.

After over a year of attorney Miller chasing me and my husband with applications for sanctions and anti-filing injunctions, I finally finally filed with the court my grievance against attorney Miller about his doxxing the child to spite former DSS Commissioner Scuderi-Hunter, I wrote about it in a prior blog on April 6, 2026.

What did Miller do?

Miller is very predictable.

He had a knee-jerk reaction and immediately put his foot further into his own mouth.

Here is what he did: he asked the court in one of our cases to punish my husband and I for my grievance against him to attorney grievance committee about child-doxxing, where he admitted under the penalty of perjury that he had to remove unredacted records of the child from NYSCEF and replace them with redacted records.

When my husband brought a motion for sanctions against Miller for attempting to punish my husband for my substantiated grievance, Miller (1) defaulted by not opposing the motion - at all;  (2) then ran his mouth at the oral argument that Fred still needs to be sanctioned - because, according to Miller, if we sue together, we are fair game to be sanctioned together, both, for acitons of one another - even if those actions were out of court, unrelated to the particular litigation and a protected activity, like my attorney grievance was.

Of course, Miller claimed that that attorney grievance was "unsubstantiated" - without providing any evidence of that.

So - I filed another grievance, for Miller's repeated retaliation for that grievance, attaching all the necessary documents.

Here is the grievance of today:




And another one.


Supported by the text of a sworn affirmation to withdraw from a federal lawsuit because CPS represented by Miller were blackmailing my clients, the lawsuit itself, and the docket report showing Miller as representing Delaware County defendants in the case.

That is about "ad hominem attacks" that the supposedly noble Sir Miller is constantly complaining about.

And even now - his entire hysterical (or drunk? or both) campaign for sanctions since February of 2026 (and the longer one, since May of 2025) did not even need to happen. 

All I needed was access to records to which I had an entitlement of access.

I asked politely for that access before filing the lawsuit, too, so Delaware County taxpayers would not have to foot the bill for my lawsuit.  


But Miller - as a very helpful ... smart person - put his foot into his mouth even further.  He was so irate about me publishing the grievance against him into open access into the court docket that he forgot himself - once again - and volunteered this, under the penalty of perjury, mind:



Which immediately begged multiple questions:

(1) why didn't Miller disclose his WITNESS status in Neroni v Gransbury? - where I clearly alleged that the County may have monitored my actions in the online deed registry and the pay per view paywall was introduced BECAUSE OF ME;

(2) what records he reviewed showing that the County was surveilling my IP address activity - FOR YEARS?

(3) Where are those logs?

So - I filed a Freedom of Information/1st Amendment request with the newest self-appointed Delaware County Records access officer - who is also, by coincidence, the County Attorney, who is also, by coincidence, one of the defendants on whose behalf Miller asked the court for sanctions against my husband for my grievance against Miller to AGC.

Here:






So - let's go back to our fairy tale and go on with our peeling of the onion layers.

We stopped at the layer called:

We noticed that you are looking at the records.

Wait, what?

Apparently someone had become interested in my internet activity.

Nothing says "public access policy" quite like keeping an eye on the people trying to access the public records.

Then came another layer:

Because we noticed your activity, we have decided to impose restrictions.

Now we were entering performance-art territory.

I was denied access to records because I wanted access to records.

Kafka himself would have demanded royalties.

But the true masterpiece was hidden in the center of the onion.

While arguing that I should not have access to the records...

While charging enormous fees for the records...

While monitoring my efforts to obtain the records...

While defending restrictions on the records...

The very same people marched into court and demanded sanctions against me.

And what evidence did they rely upon?

The records.

The same records.

The records I supposedly should not have.

The records I was allegedly abusing.

The records they were trying to prevent me from seeing.

The records they insisted were unnecessary.

Those records.

At this point I began to suspect I was not participating in a legal proceeding but rather starring in an escape room designed by bureaucrats.

Imagine a bank announcing:

"You are not authorized to view your account balance."

Then suing you for incorrectly calculating your account balance.

Then introducing your account balance as evidence.

That is roughly where we were.

The deeper I looked, the stranger it became.

The system appeared to operate according to a revolutionary new principle of public administration:

If a citizen does not know what the government is doing, the citizen is uninformed.

If a citizen finds out what the government is doing, the citizen is suspicious.

If a citizen complains about what the government is doing, the citizen is troublesome.

If a citizen files a lawsuit, the citizen is sanctionable.

A perfect closed-loop ecosystem.

Like a self-cleaning oven, except with constitutional implications.

Eventually I stared at the onion diagram spread across my desk.

Arrows pointed everywhere.

Records pointed to sanctions.

Sanctions pointed to records.

Restrictions pointed to monitoring.

Monitoring pointed to restrictions.

The same people appeared repeatedly, like recurring villains in a low-budget legal thriller.

And there, in the center, sat the onion itself.

The Core Contradiction.

They say I do not deserve access to the records.

Yet they use those same records to punish me for asking.

I have to admit, as contradictions go, it is elegant.  Even too elegant.

The sort of contradiction that should be preserved behind glass in a museum.

Schoolchildren could visit.

"Mommy, what is that?"

"That, dear, is a Class-A Bureaucratic Onion."

"What does it do?"

"No one knows. Every time somebody tries to understand it, another layer appears."

And that is how I learned that the problem was never really the records.

The problem was peeling the onion.

Because once you start peeling, everyone becomes very nervous about what might be underneath.

And judging from the frantic effort to stop the peeling, I suspect they are nervous for a reason.

Sir Frank W. Miller, Esq. and the Amazing Human Shrinking Machine

Once upon a time, in a land where paperwork grew wild and free, there lived the celebrated inventor Sir Frank W. Miller, Esq.

Sir Miller was famous throughout the kingdom for a remarkable device.

He called it the Amazing Human Shrinking Machine.




Unlike ordinary shrinking machines, which reduced only physical size, Sir Miller's invention reduced something far more useful:

People.

Not their bodies.

Their identities.

The machine occupied an entire castle wing and consisted of gears, belts, funnels, levers, pipes, wheels, pulleys, sorting trays, shredders, compressors, and several mysterious components labeled "Trust Me."

Visitors came from distant provinces to marvel at its operation.

"How does it work?" they would ask.

"Very simply," Sir Miller replied.

"You place a whole human being into this opening, and out comes a much more manageable version."

One day the machine received a particularly difficult assignment.

A woman named Tatiana.

The attendants consulted the intake checklist.

Mother?

Yes.

Wife?

Yes.

Caregiver?

Yes.

Daughter caring for an elderly parent?

Yes.

Musician?

Yes.

Animal rescuer?

Yes.

Gardener?

Yes.

Researcher?

Yes.

Journalist?

A big Yes.

Statistician?

Yes.

Linguist?

Yes.

Litigator?

Yes.

Disabled person?

Yes.

Survivor?

Yes.

The attendants stared at the list.

"This one is going to be difficult."

"Nonsense," said Sir Miller. "The machine can handle anything."

The process began.

Tatiana entered one side.

Immediately alarms sounded.

CLANG.

BANG.

HONK.

A red light flashed.

WARNING: EXCESSIVE CONTEXT.

The engineers removed the context.

The machine resumed.

Twenty seconds later another alarm sounded.

WARNING: DOCUMENT OVERLOAD.

The documents were removed.

The machine resumed.

A third alarm appeared.

WARNING: EVIDENCE DETECTED.

The evidence was quickly extracted.

A fourth warning followed.

WARNING: HUMAN COMPLEXITY EXCEEDS RECOMMENDED LIMITS.

Sir Miller rolled his eyes.

"Take out the complexity."

The engineers did.

The machine finally settled down.

Its gears hummed contentedly.

Its belts spun.

Its pistons pumped.

Its Narrative Compression Chamber glowed bright red.

At last a small card emerged from the output slot.

Sir Miller picked it up triumphantly.

"TROUBLEMAKER."

The crowd applauded.

"Amazing!"

"Brilliant!"

"Efficient!"

A child raised her hand.

"Excuse me."

Sir Miller sighed.

Children were notorious for asking inconvenient questions.

"Yes?"

"What happened to all the other things?"

"What other things?"

"The mother."

"Filtered."

"The daughter."

"Filtered."

"The journalist."

"Filtered."

"The education."

"Filtered."

"The disabilities."

"Filtered."

"The caregiving."

"Filtered."

"The research."

"Filtered."

"The facts."

"Definitely filtered."

The child frowned.

"So the machine doesn't really describe the person?"

Sir Miller adjusted his spectacles.

"Of course it does."

"How?"

"It gives us a label."

"But what if the label is wrong?"

Sir Miller looked horrified.

"My dear child, nobody checks labels."

The crowd nodded wisely.

This seemed entirely reasonable.

Soon the machine became a national success.

Complex people entered.

Simple labels emerged.

A teacher became "Agitator."

A doctor became "Problematic."

A farmer became "Difficult."

A librarian became "Concerning."

An accountant became "Extremely Concerning."

The kingdom had never been more efficient.

People no longer wasted time learning about one another.

A single label did all the work.

Then disaster struck.

One morning Tatiana returned.

She brought carts.

Not one cart.

Not two carts.

Seven carts.

The carts contained timelines, records, transcripts, reports, public documents, spreadsheets, photographs, notes, and approximately twelve metric tons of context.

"What are you doing?" asked Sir Miller nervously.

"Feeding the machine."

The first cart went in.

The machine rattled.

The second cart went in.

The machine groaned.

The third cart went in.

Smoke appeared.

The fourth cart went in.

Several gears resigned.

The fifth cart went in.

A piston attempted retirement.

The sixth cart went in.

A warning siren screamed:

CRITICAL FAILURE.
NUANCE LEVELS EXCEED DESIGN SPECIFICATIONS.

The seventh cart entered.

The machine exploded.

Not dramatically.

More in an administrative sense.

Springs flew.

Bolts scattered.

Three gears filed complaints.

The Narrative Compression Chamber simply gave up and wandered away.

When the smoke cleared, the output slot produced a final message.

ERROR.

UNABLE TO REDUCE HUMAN BEING TO CONVENIENT LABEL.

PLEASE REVIEW FULL RECORD.

The kingdom fell silent.

Nobody had ever seen such a thing.

Sir Miller stared at the message.

The crowd stared at the message.

The child smiled.

And from that day forward, whenever someone offered a suspiciously simple explanation for a complicated person, the people of the kingdom would whisper:

"Careful."

"That's exactly how the Amazing Human Shrinking Machine got broken."

Sunday, June 7, 2026

The Kingdom of Hamden and the Mystery of the Vanishing Supervisors - Oh, What A Wayne!


Oh what a reign/Wayne!

Late spring back in twenty-twenty-six...

Went so strange,

From Wayne to Wayne - and quick!

      What a race and what a Wayne! 


Once upon a time, in the remote and mist-covered Kingdom of Hamden, there stood many remarkable things.

There were castles.

There were committees.

There were advisory committees advising the committees.

There were nonprofits supervised by supervisors who also sat on the boards of the nonprofits they supervised.

There were addresses.

Very special addresses.

In fact, there was one address so magical that it appeared to belong to several different places at once.

The Royal Records showed that 33195 State Highway 10 somehow belonged to multiple parcels, multiple descriptions, multiple realities, and, depending on which royal scroll one consulted, perhaps even multiple municipalities.


Ordinary peasants found this confusing.

The Royal Bureau of Address Harmonization found it perfectly normal.

"Nothing to see here," declared the Royal Clerks.

"Addresses are fluid concepts."

The peasants nodded respectfully because arguing with government databases was known to shorten life expectancy.

Meanwhile, the kingdom was governed by a distinguished class known as the Perpetual Supervisors.

Unlike ordinary mortals, Perpetual Supervisors did not merely hold office.

They fused with it.

One such nobleman was Lord Wayne of Marshfield.

For nearly thirty years he served as Supervisor of Hamden, guardian of committees, keeper of summaries, the hero of senior meals program, representative of WAC castles on magic addresses, signer of letters that start bigtime expensive lawsuits (for taxpayers, not for Lord Marshfield), attendee of meetings, and witness to countless discussions whose details somehow evaporated from memory the moment a deposition would begin.


The kingdom admired such dedication.

For decades, Lord Wayne appeared immovable.

Mountains eroded.

Governors changed.

Presidents came and went.

But Lord Wayne remained.

Then came the Butterfly.

Not an ordinary butterfly.

A Statistical Butterfly.

A radioactive one.

It emerged from forbidden charts and spreadsheets - filed (the horror!) in court, too - despite paywalls carefully constructed by the Royal servant Lady (that's a title, not an attribute) Gransbury who, 

according to Lady Gransbury's very own court-extinguisher, surveils the butterfly's (and everybody else's) IP activity in the online registries of the DelCo Empire, the Empire that devours - oops - contains the Kingdom of Hamden.



 


And, butterflies are very understanding creatures - even as to those who try to extinguish them - and they fully realize that court-extinguishers are individuals with a full array of a variety of interesting senses, and with their own entitlement to knee-jerk reactions to things like these and like these.

But, back to our fairy tale butterfly charts and spreadsheets, here we go.



This absolutely evil butterfly and her charts and spreadsheets carried dangerous powers.

THEY COMPARED NUMBERS!!!!

And the numbers begged - really, really badly - questions, really, really big ones.

And the worst of it - the absolutely improper and indecent butterfly left THA PAPER TRAIL, visible to PEASANT TAXPAYERS!  CALLING UPON THEIR REBELLION OF THINKING AND ASKING QUESTIONS!!! 

Lord Marshfield and Kingdom of Hamden royalty was ... how to put it politely - outed.

Panic ensued.

Soon strange things began appearing throughout the kingdom.

Citizens started whispering:

"Why do some assessments seem to float far below sale prices?"

"Why do others float above?"

"Why does the graph look like a butterfly?"

"Why is everyone suddenly angry at spreadsheets?"

These were dangerous questions.

Immediately the Royal Public Relations Wizards issued emergency bulletins.

The butterfly was irresponsible.

The butterfly was divisive.

The butterfly lacked proper civic attitude.

The butterfly had probably violated several committee rules.

Unfortunately, the butterfly continued flying.

Then another complication arrived.

The State Audit Turtle.

The Audit Turtle was a legendary creature.

It moved very slowly.

Sometimes so slowly that nobody could tell whether it was moving at all.

But when it finally appeared, kingdoms became nervous.

Especially kingdoms with overlapping addresses.

Especially kingdoms with public money.

Especially kingdoms with delayed audits.

Especially kingdoms where the same names appeared repeatedly on boards, committees, nonprofits, advisory councils, oversight bodies, funding arrangements, rescue operations, and emergency press releases.

The Royal Council assured everyone that all was well.

Emergency meetings were held.

Press releases were issued.

Additional committees were formed.

A Task Force on Butterfly Awareness was established.

A Commission on Responsible Spreadsheet Usage was proposed.

A Working Group on Excessive Curiosity was discussed.

Then something extraordinary happened.

Election races happened - yes, there were still those, even though the outcomes were, for 30 years, Putin-like - ("we elect Marshfield - elections").

And this particular election race was suddenly NOT Putin-like.  Marshfield quietly disappeared from the race - without an explanation.

The Kingdom of Hamden gasped.  Where is Pu... Marshfield?

The butterflies gasped.

The spreadsheets gasped.

Even the Audit Turtle appeared mildly surprised.

Court historians immediately began debating the significance.

Official historians explained:

"Pure coincidence."

Independent historians observed:

"That is a very interesting coincidence."

Journalists sharpened their pencils.

The Royal Public Relations Wizards demanded sanctions against the pencils and engaged some court-extinguishers of evil butterflies (the court-extinguisher toils overtime, since the interlinked fairy tale he filed two more fairy tale - PUNISH PUNISH PUNISH HER SHE STILL MOVES AND BREATHES YOUR HONOR!!! - thingies).





to join the previous company:









(as to the last one, the court-extinguisher was briefly dazed and ascribed the butterfly's husband's motion to conduct discovery into the court-extinguisher's magical representation of Lord Marshfield while at the same time investigating and prosecuting Lord Marshfield to the butterfly herself - because, guess what, these butterflies and their husbands are indistinguishable, don't you think? Especially to super-experienced court-extinguishers?).



While all of that butterfly-extinguishing drama was unfolding, The Audit Turtle continued approaching, The Butterfly continued flying, and the Kingdom of Hamden was nowhere farther away from the oh so possible federal raid investigating - without any bars from any court-extinguishing teams - the little discrepancies (for millions, potentially billions of dollars) in the Kingdom of Hamden's tax assessments, and into who got what under the table for these so-little breaks.

And somewhere in the distance, hidden behind hills, forests, committees, overlapping addresses, delayed audits, advisory boards, magical tax parcels, mysterious nonprofits, and approximately twelve thousand pages of public records, the Kingdom of Hamden entered a new era.

An era in which the villagers had begun asking questions.

Which, as every ruler knows, is where the real trouble starts.

But the main thing is - against the onslaught of the evil butterfly, the Pu-elections have taken a turn - from one Wayne to another.  Now the Kingdom of Hamden will have Wayne-the-Financial-Wizard-Butterfly-Fighter-And-Another-Deposition-Hero - maybe, another-double-deposition-hero.  With Kingdom's excited peasants looking at another 30 years of Pu-Wayne#2-elections. 








Oh, What A Change!


Tuesday, May 26, 2026

On The Benefits Of Fresh Mountain Air






Tourists come to Delaware County for:

  • mountains,
  • rivers,
  • covered bridges,
  • and charming small towns.

What they do not realize is that beneath the picturesque scenery lies a hereditary vampire dynasty with pension benefits.

Observe the evolutionary cycle carefully.

First came Dick Northrup:

  • longtime DA,
  • institutional patriarch,
  • builder of prosecutorial gravity itself.

Under King Dick served loyal ADA John — later to become:

The Hon.  John “The InkPot” Hubbard,

patron saint of racially inappropriate courtroom commentary and future Lord of Family Court.

Then the first metamorphosis occurred.

Dick evolved upward into County Judge.

At which point Hubbard molted seamlessly into DA.

This was not considered unusual in Delaware County because the County already operated under the ancient doctrine:

“Why hire strangers when the same six people can rotate forever?”

Then came the second metamorphosis.

Dick resigned from the bench.

John The InkPot ascended into judgeship.

Shawn Smith became DA.

And Dick — having now:

  • prosecuted felony cases,
  • supervised prosecutors,
  • become judge,
  • left judgeship,
  • and re-entered prosecution —

returned majestically as ADA under Shawn Smith, reportedly presenting grand jury felony matters to:

John The InkPot -

Who had previously served:

  • under Dick,
  • after Dick,
  • and before Dick returned to prosecute before him again.

At this point even the laws of chronology filed for early retirement.

Especially because with him, Dick brought back to DA's office - no, not another Bowie, another Dick - now called the "little Eric" - the Senior Meals hero, the child advocate, the Walton village deputy mayor - and the keeper of the traffic ticket fabrication (or drug forfeiture?) money-pot for the vampire family clan.

This is not a legal system anymore.

This is a Vampire Empire community theater production where all official vampires keeps changing costumes but nobody leaves the stage.  Who would - with such vampire family benefits?

The beauty of the system lies in its efficiency.

Why waste taxpayer resources on:

  • institutional independence,
  • fresh perspectives,
  • or separation of functions,

when the same people can simply:

  • prosecute each other’s cases,
  • replace each other’s offices,
  • supervise each other’s careers,
  • and later preside over one another’s felony presentations?

In larger jurisdictions this might create:

  • ethical panic,
  • newspaper investigations,
  • legislative hearings,
  • or documentaries narrated by exhausted British actors.

In DelCo it creates:

continuity.

And somewhere deep in the mountains, a confused outsider holding a Constitution quietly asks:

“Wait… is this normal?”

At which point the entire County labyrinth turns slowly in unison and replies:

“FRIVOLOUS.”

The Vampire Empire has even more vampire family benefits. 

In most empires, people apply for jobs.

In DelCo, jobs simply migrate through bloodlines like spawning salmon.

The process is elegant.

A Bowie hatches in the Sheriff’s Department, migrates briefly through Probation, mates in a patrol car near DSS, and eventually returns upstream to a County vehicle with lights on top, unscathed.

A Bowie might even slam that patrol vehicle into a citizen or two, throw a facer at a girlfriend - or three, and have their victim put in jail for scratching his shin while being dragged on the floor - why not? 

A Covell would kill a father of two, escape - as royalty should - with a slap on her dainty wrist, morph into a respectable Taggart, assess taxes, sell real estate for a profit she just created by raising taxes, and - briefly, but scandalously - Chair the Royal Repub... oh, Vampire Party dinners.

And so the spawning continues.

A Kelso here and a Kelso there.

A Bishop here and a Bishop - right over there.

A Faulkner here - and a Faulkner here again.

A Moshier here - and a Moshier there.

A big Morgan here - and a vociferous Reihert-Morgan over there. 

Biologists remain baffled.

The County insists this is all coincidence.

Researchers attempting to map the ecosystem were last seen wandering through:

  • WAC,
  • Delaware Opportunities,
  • code enforcement,
  • assessor offices,
  • party meetings,
  • and opioid task-force committees,
    muttering:

“Wait… why is everybody here also over there?”

At the center of the maze sits the ancient DelCo aristocracy, the M&M&M&M Royal Vampire Council.

It reigns.  Magnanimously.  Contentedly.

Because - you know what - the fresh mountain air will take care of all the stink, after all.  

It always does.









Sunday, May 24, 2026

The Court That Loved Squid

 




Far beyond the civilized shores of Ordinary Procedure sailed the once-peaceful litigation universe known as Neroni v. Watershed Agricultural Council, EF2026-106 in New York State Delaware County Supreme Court.  Yes that interesting piece trying to question the happenings in the WAC Castle.

For a while, everything behaved according to the sacred ancient customs:
operative pleadings defined the universe,
parties stayed inside the case,
non-parties stayed outside the case,
and motions generally required at least a faint relationship to jurisdiction.

Then came April 3, 2026.

An Amended Verified Complaint was filed.
Wayne Marshfield vanished from the operative pleading.
Under ordinary laws of civil procedure, he should have peacefully drifted away into the misty afterlife reserved for former litigants.

Instead, something absolutely extraordinary occurred.

The former party mutated into giant procedural sea food.

Soon an enormous litigation squid emerged from the dark waters outside the case universe, waving slimy appendages labeled:
“Motion #2”
“Motion #3”
“Sanctions”
“Anti-Filing Injunction”

The squid had:
no party status,
no standing,
no intervention,
no authority,
and no visible respect for maritime or procedural boundaries.

Naturally, one might expect the Court to say:
“Excuse me, sir, you are a cephalopod outside the litigation.”

But no.

Instead, the squid was welcomed warmly into the procedural ecosystem.

Soon the entire litigation universe began revolving around the highly aggressive calamari.

The actual claims started disappearing beneath its pulsing tentacles.
The operative pleading cracked apart like a doomed sailing vessel.
Facts, evidence, and due process floated helplessly through space like debris after a cosmic shipwreck.

Meanwhile, the Court stood nearby, calmly assisting the creature  while insisting that all of this was perfectly normal litigation management.

At some point, I stopped asking:
“Why is the squid attacking the case?”

and began asking the more important constitutional question:

“Why is the Court taking orders from seafood?”